We are imperfect beings striving and struggling to be perfect. As imperfect beings, it can be so difficult for us to love someone unconditionally or make relationship stronger through time.
To make relationship stronger is hard, isn’t it?
Love, and loving someone comes with conditions. Some people love someone because of his/her possession such as money, house, car; for some people, height, weight, skin type, etc. are also the criteria for love and relationship. For some people color, creed, and race are important categories to fall in love with. Without meeting these conditions, love does not happen to a lot of people. One might argue that if you have set conditions for love, then it is not love but something else, i.e. infatuation, greed, social conditioning, etc.
People have always said that love happens without any conditions. However, in reality, we rarely see love without conditions. It is true that a lot of us want unconditional love from our partners, however, we ourselves are not ready for loving someone unconditionally. If you want someone to love you unconditionally, you also must be willing to love him/her back unconditionally. Well, love cannot happen with force, however, if you pave the grounds, it will be easy for love to sprout. Loving someone unconditionally means you are in true love.
A lot of people do not find true love in their life, however, if you are one of the few lucky people, you must also learn how to reciprocate. If you want true love, unconditional love, these practical steps might help you.
Tactics for an unconditional love
- Overlook imperfections
Nobody is perfect; this should be written boldly on everyone’s minds. Once we come to terms with this truth, we will be able to free ourselves with the conditions related to physical or other imperfections and we will be able to love freely, without holding back. Try to overlook the features, tantrums, bad habits, misbehavior, and childishness of your partner.
- Get ready to change
The only permanent thing in this world is its ever-changing nature. You might find this statement contradictory, however, it is true that nothing remains constant in the world, everything changes, and that’s the truth. If you want your partner to change, why don’t you change yourself?
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For example, if you want your partner to love pink and s/he loves black, why don’t you start loving black instead of asking him/her to love pink. There might be changes that you want to see in your partner, however, nagging will not help you, abuse of any kind, physical, mental, or emotional, will kill the love that you are trying to build. So just be very careful when trying to get your partner to change a certain trait, however, if possible live with it.
- Live by example
You can teach your partner through your own way of life. You can share your knowledge, wisdom, ideas, dreams, vision, understanding, values, etc. However, you must remember you are not the teacher of your partner. It is ok, you want your partner to learn something, however, you should never be preachy. If you want your partner to follow in your footsteps, become an example.
However, you also need to follow your partner as well. You may not like dancing, however, if your partner loves dancing, you will have to dance with your partner. In true love, you must be the receiver first, if you are a receiver, you will soon become a giver. True love or unconditional love means you do not care whether your partner reciprocates or not, and you pin your hope on him/her and don’t give up easily. Keep up the pace and he/she will soon join you in the race.
- Learn to forgive
Well, it is very difficult to be forgiving especially when you are badly hurt. However, holding onto grudges will make you even more miserable. If you want to patch up the relationship, you must forget and forgive. If you can’t forget and forgive, you will never be the same person and you will never feel the love. Just look beyond that period, and let go of everything. Don’t let negative emotions build a home in your heart and permanently live there. You gain nothing by carrying around bad energy, so purge yourself of that emotions and forgive your spouse or partner and build pure/unconditional love for him or her.
- Pray for your partner
If you are a religiously motivated person and pray regularly, you also must pray for your partner. You must pray for your partner for his/her wellness, wellbeing; you must ask God to give him/her wisdom, knowledge, strength, power; you must ask for God’s favor. If you build positive emotions for someone, you will love the person unconditionally. Seeing someone is loving unconditionally, one will also begin to love unconditionally.
- Open communication line
Communicate with your partner every day, every moment, and this should be a two-way thing. Communication does not mean you are doing all the talking, communication also means you are listening. When you are listening, and want to say something, wait until your partner is finished. You must have the patience to become a listener. Communication is the key to a relationship, so always try to unlock all necessary doors.
- Last but not the least
You now know what it takes to build true love, unconditional love. However, make sure you are not reading this just to forget everything a couple of minutes later. You must also work on these guidelines. Well, you may not be able to love someone just by following guidelines, however, guidelines come in handy in difficult situations.